Hollow Heartbeat
by Corrupted-Phoenix
Summary: I love you too.' Axel couldn't explain why he lied so quickly. [Axel x Demyx, Axel x Roxas, Flashfic]


Wowohwow, what do we have here? A fandom newbie? Oh my, isn't she just cute and inedible!

Er, yeah, this is my very first KH2 fanfic. Ever. I'm usually good at keeping characters IC when I write, but because I'm still getting used to the characters of KH, I might have gone a little bit off here and again. If I have, I'm really sorry! XD; I'm still getting a handle on these characters; I've never poked at a game fandom before.

**Title**: Hollow Heartbeat  
**Rating**: PG.  
**Genre**: Angst.  
**Fandom**: Kingdom Hearts II.  
**Pairing**: Axel/Demyx, Axel/Roxas.  
**Word Count**: 1503.

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**Hollow Heartbeat**  
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As a Nobody, Axel isn't supposed to know emotion. He's not supposed to feel. There is no love, hate or anger in his body; only a fleeting emptiness that comes with the hollow absence of a heart. He is not supposed to feel pain or hurt.

So then, why did he feel like he was falling apart?

Somehow, he knew why. He knew that the answer to that question was because his makeshift heart had been whisked away once again, making him feel even more empty than before. When Roxas left, the beating in Axel's chest suddenly stopped.

Roxas… that one boy alone made Axel feel as though he had a heart. That one boy made emotions real to the Nobody, made his world solid and thick with emotions. He loved him. Axel knew that it was real, or was at least forcing himself to believe it was real, because Roxas was the only one to ever arouse such a feeling in the pyro. Roxas had changed him. He was still changing him.

And as Axel stood alone on his balcony every night, he silently wondered if maybe there hadn't been a heart beating inside his chest in the first place.

Axel didn't like this feeling of nothingness.

He searched, alone, through the castle walls, for a replacement. Every time another Nobody would pass by, Axel's emerald eyes would wander across them, analyzing. But there was no beating in their chest, not even an echo of one. They were all the same.

The only thing that set them apart was their eyes, and even then they were similar. Axel saw that Demyx was the only one amongst them with light in his eyes. Or had that been some artificial feeling that the whimsical blond had made up in his head?

Demyx was so unlike Roxas that Axel didn't want to have anything to do with him. Hell, that annoying blond was unlike _everyone_ in the Organization. He smiled all the time, laughed, cried, and showed more emotion than anyone in the castle. Not only that, but he was startlingly similar to a child, innocent and immature. Axel didn't like the way Demyx could laugh when all everyone else could do was frown.

The redhead approached him anyways. Demyx had smiled then, too. Maybe he-who-claims-to-have-a-heart could turn out to be close to he-who-already-does.

Axel had barely even liked the blond when he kissed him two days later. His lips were not the same as Roxas, his hair didn't feel the same, and his movements didn't match the ones Axel had become so used to. Desperate to find a new heart, Axel had shoved the blond down on his Demyx's bed, stripping him naked in a flash and fucking him a minute later. Demyx had a habit of mewling names, something he wasn't used to. He ignored it and continued to try and match something, anything to Roxas.

The only thing the same was how he curled his toes when he came, just like Roxas had used to do. Hah. That was barely enough. It was that night that Axel decided Demyx would never match Roxas, meaning there was little use to him. However, Demyx had become attached to Axel that same night.

"I love you." Demyx had whispered softly in Axel's ear, flicking out his tongue and trailing it along his collarbone.

"I love you too." Axel couldn't explain why he lied so quickly.

The two continued to see each other, but it was obvious that Demyx was the only one putting any emotional effort into the relationship. Demyx loved Axel, but there were minimal things that kept the redhead nearby.

For one, Number Eight had actually started to like the way Demyx mewled his name beneath him. For another, Demyx was attached to him now; which meant there were a lot of things that Axel could do with him. Desperation drove the third reason; maybe he might someday gain a new heart with Demyx, the emotional Nobody.

By the end of the first week, Axel still felt nothing. The only thing he had gained was some tolerance towards the blond's childish antics.

But he was not ready to let Demyx go just yet.

Even as Axel began spending long periods of time out of castle grounds in search of Roxas, he didn't throw Demyx away. His only reason was so that when he came back disappointed and alone, there would be a cute, willing fuck at home waiting for him. It was surprisingly easy for him to ignore Demyx's feelings.

But one night, Demyx had refused him.

He had been sitting on Axel's bed hugging a pillow, waiting patiently for the redhead's return. It was obvious to tell he had been crying. An upset frown was present on Demyx's face, and his gaze stayed locked with Axel's the moment he had entered the room.

Demyx had stared up at Axel with accusing eyes. "You've been lying to me, haven't you?"

"Yes. I have."

Demyx let out a soft noise that sounded like a cross between a laugh and a stifled sob. "I guess I shouldn't have expected you to sugarcoat it anyways..."

"What about you, then? Are you a liar too?" Axel asked casually, crossing his arms and shifting his weight to one leg.

"No." The water-user answered quietly with a forced smile. "I'm not."

Axel sighed. "You know that won't change anything."

"I know it won't. You love Roxas, don't you? That's why you keep searching for him."

Axel smirked. This kid wasn't as dumb as he looked after all.

"It is."

Silence. Then, "Why do you love him?"

At first, Axel had considered not answering. But he decided that with how he had treated Demyx, he deserved at least one simple answer. "He's the only one I _can_ love. He is… my heart." He whispered truthfully, frowning.

Demyx was silent when he stood from the bed, leaving the tearstained pillow behind. His eyes dropped from Axel to the ground. "I see." His voice was quiet now. "I'm leaving for Hollow Bastion tomorrow. I was going to run away and take you with me instead, because I know I'm not going to come back if I go there. I… I want to be with you forever." Demyx's eyes alone told of how upset he was, but he managed to keep his voice from quivering. "And you don't want that. I don't want you to leave me, but I don't have a choice, do I?" The blond laughed softly. "So, I've decided that if I want to be with you forever, having my forever end tomorrow really isn't so bad."

Axel stared with curious eyes at the water-user. Demyx was still smiling faintly, but it was painfully plastic and his eyes were glassy with tears.

Demyx was not Roxas. He would never _be_ Roxas. Axel laughed quietly at the realization, he was such an idiot. One can never change his heart when it is already chosen for him.

The pyro watched silently as Demyx made his way across the room and stopped for a moment when he stood by his side, facing the opposite direction. Demyx gently kissed Axel's cheek.

"You are _my_ heart. Bye, Axel."

Those were the last words he ever heard Demyx speak before the blond disappeared into a portal of darkness.

Axel couldn't say he felt guilty.

**&&&…**

You know, it didn't make too much sense to Axel as he lay on his back, slowly fading away into the darkness that had already taken Demyx. When that Sora kid came running to his side, he got the same feeling he always experienced when he was with Roxas. He could feel his heart beating again.

But what he _didn't_ understand was the emotions that unexpectedly washed over him.

He suddenly had regrets.

Truthfully, the things he regretted were selfish. He regretted the choices he had made (especially for not doing more to stop Roxas) and he regretted all the times he didn't take another path, one that would have lead him so much farther towards his own goals than where he was now. However… there was one thing that made no sense.

It involved Demyx.

There was an odd emotion tied to that one Nobody, one he had never experienced before; even with the aid of Roxas's heart. It wasn't love or hate, that was for certain, and it wasn't something like anger or happiness either. It was some complicated matter in which he had no experience in.

The thought silently gnawed away at the back of his mind until it finally comprehended something. It was found with only a weak grasp, the letters slowly unscrambling to make a word Axel could barely read.

Had that word been sorry?

He wasn't too sure on _that_, but looking up at this Sora kid as he faded back into the darkness, he _was_ sure that there was a beating heart somewhere in his chest.

Or had it been bleeding?

He wasn't sure.


End file.
